The 12 hour Girl

So the new cast for our Spring show is here. Well, most of them. We had the pleasure of experiencing the presence of one cast member for less than a day. She came, she saw, she went. Ok, there is more to it than that. The girl's name was Shannon. Shannon drove about 8 hours here from St. Louis. She also came with her mother and her mother's friend who occupied another car because she apparently had too much stuff to fit into one car. Ok, you're here for three months...two carfuls seems a little excessive. She is 25 years old and a hairdresser. She dropped her job in St. Louis because she was so excited to come here. Well, apparently that excitement dwindled to a mere speck when she saw where she would be living and realized how much was expected from her in the show. I'll be the first to admit that the cast housing here isn't the most spectacular in the world but it's FREE. Not only that but many theatres provide much less stellar habitats. But Shannon wasn't having it. I knew the second that I met her she wasn't going to last. She freaked when she went to eat at a diner about 5 minutes from here because everyone there apparently had mullets. The clincher though must have been the music rehearsal. Shannon didn't and couldn't read music AT ALL. The shows here require the performers to sing a lot of ensemble singing and 4 part+ harmonies. Not to mention that I move fast in my rehearsals and I expect my performers to keep up. If there are those that need a little extra help outside of rehearsals, that is fine. But I'm not about to waste everybody's time because one person can't keep up. That freaked Shannon because she probably thought there would be very little harmonies and we would just have her sing solos most of the show. That was not the case. So Shannon was here for approximately 20 hours. Less than a day. But we have fun exaggerating a little (of course) and calling her the "12 hour girl". Ah poor Shannon. Little does she know that she just put a nice big bruise on her career. She wasn't even willing to give us (or herself) a chance and that's, in a business sense, is highly unacceptable. But at least she didn't waste our time.

Another Joke...

This one made me laugh pretty hard:

LAST CHILD SUPPORT CHECK!!!

Today is my baby girl's 18th birthday. I be so glad that this be my last child support payment! Month after month, year after year, all those damn payments! Didn't think I ever see this day!So I call my baby girl, LaKeesha, to come to my house, and when she get there, I say, "Baby girl, I want you to take this check over to yo momma house and tell her this be the last check she ever be gettin' from me, and then I want you to come back and tell me the 'spression on yo mama's face." So my baby girl she take the check over to her. I be anxious to hear what she say and what she look like. Baby girl walk through the door, I say, "Now what yo momma say 'bout that?" She say to tell you that "you ain't my daddy" .... and watch the 'spression on yo face.