Best Films 2007

I just watched the video from my last post and cracked up yet again. Good stuff.

I now present to you the annual best films blog. This, of course, being the best films of 2007. It's a little late, I know. But, better late than never! Right? Right?!!


10. 3:10 To Yuma

I went and saw this film on a recommendation. I've never been a huge fan of the western genre. However, I thoroughly enjoyed Unforgiven, Clint Eastwood's western epic that took the genre to a whole new level, This film, being a remake, continues the tradition of having a western with poignant parallels on the realities of life, love, family, and simple morality. Great performances and cinematography add to the films already sensational, yet unique, script.

9. Superbad

It's crass, it has no tact, and it's possibly the most offensive film of the year. It completely reflects the humor of the new generation. The generation who grew up with South Park and Family Guy and when they went to the movies with friends they snuck in to see American Pie and Scary Movie. Can you imagine your mother seeing this movie with you? Neither can I.

8. Enchanted

What a clever movie. Catchy tunes, witty dialogue, and another sensational performance by Amy Adams make this film so effective. The film had its weak moments. Susan Sarandon was pretty thankless and her role in the movie just made things awkward at times. But it was one of the most original films of the year and who could resist the charms of Disney essentially making fun of itself? Not me.

7. Harry Potter And The Order of the Phoenix

These films just progressively get better and better. I remember reading the 5th book immediately upon its release a few years ago and being somewhat indifferent about it. It was long, too long. The movie, however, was almost too short. If not, then it was certainly "just right." This is the only film I saw twice in the theatres this year. And with that being said, it is one of only maybe 5 or 6 movies I've ever seen more than once in a theatre. I guess that speaks volumes on how much I enjoyed it, even though the second time I saw it it was in 3D. So cool. So very, very cool. Imelda Staunton gave the years best Supporting Actress performance. Perfect Umbridge.

6. No End In Sight

This is a compelling documentary about the beginning of the war in Iraq. How did it happen? What went wrong? How did this all get out of hand and who's to blame? The answers to all these questions, and many more, are provided within this suprisingly unbiased film. It just states the facts. This is what happened. Whether you are Left or Right, Up or Down, or Black or Blue you can't argue with this film. I'm going to stop now before I start to write stuff that may be a little bias. See this documentary. Have viewing parties.

5. Eastern Promises

Another Cronenberg success. After falling in love with "History of Violence" a couple years ago, I knew that this film was a must-see. Not quite the masterpiece that "History" was, this film still manages to hold it's own. Whether you're distracted by Viggo and his penis or the grotesque slashing of throats that happens throughout, you can't get past the fact that this is one hell of a story with great performances. Sure, you could just call it another mafia movie, but then you'd just be an idiot. Speaking of, why are movies about the mob always so good?

4. No Country For Old Men

This movie could have been number one. It really, really could have been. Then I saw it. Well, I loved the first 80 percent and then, like about everybody else, I hated the ending. I DON'T CARE how poignant you thought it was or how profound or how non-linear or "against the grain" or original or whatever you want to call it...it sucked. What the hell was Tommy Lee Jones talking about? Who the f*** was that old man he was talking to? What the hell happened to Josh Brolin? God knows we didn't see him get killed and the shot of his body was vague to say the least. I didn't even know it was his body until after the movie was over! Ok, ok...I know what you are thinking. I certainly seem to be trashing this movie that I'm putting so high on my list. Well, like I said, the first 80 percent of the film was fantasic. It had so much tension and suspense, I was on the edge of my seat. Also, I love the Coen brothers, Fargo is my favorite movie of all time. It's a perfect film. This movie, well, it's flawed but still pretty damn good...for about 90 minutes.

3. There Will Be Blood

Every year I seem to really fall for a movie based on a performance. This movie could very well possibly be the one this year. However, there were other things I loved about it. I thoroughly enjoyed the cinematography. The direction was quite good as well. PT Anderson is very good at what he does, if not a little pretentious. I hate Magnolia. I also hate Punch Drunk Love. Those movies trigger something in my brain that makes me want to never watch another movie again. BUT, I love Boogie Nights. It's probably my number 2 film of all time. It's definitely up there. TOp 5 at least.

2. Sweeney Todd

I didn't know what to expect with this film. Movie musicals are truly hit or miss with me. But this film did something entirely unexpected: it improved upon the already near perfect stage production. I didn't miss the chorus, I didn't miss any songs, I didn't mind that the leads weren't the strongest singers. In the end it all turned out to be the perfect film adaptation. Toby being an actual child (unlike the stage version where he is an adult playing a child) added a whole new dynamic to the character that I never appreciated before. Sure there were some flaws, including the awkward "By The Sea" number that all of a sudden transformed the film from Sondheim's "Sweeney Todd" to Tim Burton's "Sweeney Todd" and Helena Bonham Carter will never live up to the phenomenal performance by Angela Lansbury in the original production. But the movie, especially in its final poignant moments, just continues to prove why Sondheim is a living legend and his legacy will remain for centuries.

1. Grindhouse

Grindhouse?! What?!! Yes, you heard me...GRINDHOUSE! Does anybody remember this fabulous experience? I thoroughly enjoyed it. 2 films for the price of one. Trailers in between films that had me laughing, grimacing, and wishing that they weren't just FAKE trailers and they were advertising movies that might actually be released. The films, with their low quality and campy scripts, were perfectly "B". The first film, "Planet Terror", was by far the superior of the two films, but I didn't see this as two separate films. I saw this as a unique and entertaining film-going experience. If I were to judge these films separately then I'm not sure that either film would make this top 10 list but together they somehow manage to make it to the top. Go figure.



Honorable Mentions: Hairspray, Sicko, Oceans 13, Stardust, Juno, Ratatoille

Worst Films of the Year: Bug, Next, Norbit

At the 69th annual...

Magnolia

I hate this movie. Always have. I watched it a second time because everybody told me how great they think it is. I still hated it. Totally ostentatious, pretentious, pile of doo. Oooo look at the frogs, how poignant. Yeah right. PT did so much better with Boogie Nights and There Will Be Blood because he didn't try so hard. Punch Drunk sucks too.

Heartwarming

I don't usually like these heartwarming stories, but this one is truly interesting...

In 1986, Mkele Mbembe was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University.

On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Mbembe approached it very carefully.

He got down on one knee and inspected the elephant's foot and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it.

As carefully and as gently as he could, Mbembe worked the wood out with his hunting knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot.
The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments.

Mbembe stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away.
Mbembe never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.

Twenty years later, Mbembe was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Mbembe and his son Tapu were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Mbembe, lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.

Remembering the encounter in 1986, Mbembe couldn't help wondering if this was the same elephant.

Mbembe summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Mbembe' s legs and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly.


Probably wasn't the same elephant.

OMG It Gets Better

Now That's Talent!

Sad News

Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.

Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flour.

Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times he still was a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions.

Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, two children, John Dough and Jane Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart.

The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.

BONUS! MUST WATCH!!

B is for Bible

I don't know if anyone else out there experienced this as much as I did, but do you remember going to church as a child and having those lessons where the minister would come up with a word and then break the word down so that each letter started another word that represented some extension of the original word? Wow, did I really just say that? OK, in other words, the preacher would say the word today is "Righteous" and then the "R" would stand for "Risen" because Jesus has "risen" from the dead. Then he'd go into more details about the word "risen" so that he could fill time. I suppose that lesson technique is what they teach you in Preaching 101...perhaps it's also in the "Preaching for Dummies" book at B&N (please tell me there really isn't one). It's almost like the preacher woke up that morning and totally forgot to come up with a sermon so he does this carbon-copy, boring, stale, blue-print of a sermon that is more about filling time than it is about being profound and educational.

These type of sermons are sorta like dirty dimes. When you walk down the street and see a dirty dime you just pick it up and look at it then throw it back down on the ground only to have someone else pick up the dime and preach about it (OK, seriously, this whole dirty dime thing is an inside joke...but if you found it profound then more power to you).

For the sake of absolutely nothing I'm going to come up with a word and break it down:

Word: Mr. Chocolate (I know it's actually 2 words and it's from the movie Grizzly Man but shut-up)

M is for Magic because Chocolate is magic. So is Harry Potter. And Weed. Uh...I mean Weeds the T.V. show...seriously, I meant the TV show!

R is for Reading because if you can't read then you're a retard.

The "." is for that girl who made fun of me when I told her that a period was the dot at the end of a sentence when I was 10 years old. How foolish I was...oh, how foolish.

C is for Coke because I love it so. THE DRINK you potheads!

H is for Holy because I always enjoyed singing that song in church. Holy Holy Holy Lord God Almighty. But I use to go Holy Holy Moly Lord God Almighty. As an 8 year old I found that highly amusing.

O is for Ominous for no particular reason.

C is for Coccyx...that little bone at the bottom of your spine. It's your butt bone!

O is for Old because this is getting old.

L is for Luminous because I am so luminous!

A is for Archery because it was offered as one of those gay gym classes in college. Ugh, gym in college...what a waste of precious, precious drinking time.

T is for Time because time is all we have people. We are all going to die and that sucks. But at least we don't have to live forever. I think that by the time the ice age rolled around or the sun blew up and the earth was a billion trillion degrees that living forever would really really suck.

E is for Educational because, unlike those lame sermons, this blog post was educational.

Amen.

God Bless Us Every One

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

-Travis

Harry Potter Puppets

Pretty funny stuff, especially when you get towards the end.

The Magic of Editing

Several years ago I had the privilege of watching a recut trailer for Sound of Music that made it come across as a horror movie. It was brilliant. I couldn't find that particular trailer on youtube (there were a couple knock offs), but I did find these that are equally amusing.

Mary Poppins as a Horror Movie



The Shining as a Romantic Comedy (my personal favorite)

So True

As Ben Franklin said: In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria.

In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we drink 1 liter of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli, (E. coli) - bacteria found in feces. In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop.

However, we do NOT run that risk when drinking wine and beer (or tequila, rum, whiskey or other liquor) because alcohol has to go through a purification process of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting.

Remember: Water = Poop, Wine = Health

Therefore, it's better to drink wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of shit.

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information: I'm doing it as a public service.

Lake Geneva

So I'm currently working in Wisconsin at a resort called Grand Geneva. It's a beautiful resort with a spa, ski facilities, beautiful lodging, and an awesome indoor swimming facility. If you want to check it out go to www.grandgeneva.com. I'm playing piano for their Christmas Show: Hooray for Holidays! The resort also has several restaurants including an Italian restaurant that is apparently very, very exquisite. I will try to document some of my experiences here on the blog. The people are all very nice here and the show is coming along nicely. So wish me luck and I hope all of you are doing interesting and entertaining things as well.

Chicken Recipe

Here is a chicken recipe that also includes the use of popcorn as a stuffing. Imagine that! When I found it, I thought it was perfect for people like me, who just are not sure how to tell when poultry is thoroughly cooked, but not dried out. Give this a try.

BAKED STUFFED CHICKEN

6-7 lb. chicken
1 cup melted butter
1 cup stuffing (Pepperidge Farm is good.)
1 cup uncooked popcorn (Orville Redenbacher's Low
Fat) Salt/pepper to taste

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Brush chicken well with melted butter, salt, and pepper. Fill cavity with stuffing and popcorn.

Place in baking pan with the neck end toward the back of the oven.

Listen for the popping sounds. When the chicken's ass blows the oven door open and the chicken flies across the room, it's done.

McDonalds Monopoly

How ingenious is this concept anyways? Whoever came up with the idea of playing monopoly by buying a large fries and drink should be punished. It is addicting and cruel. I don't like McDonalds. I don't like their food and I think they are one of the primary sources of obesity and lack-of-health in this country. Yet, I still find myself going to McDonalds to play Monopoly. I really could use a million dollars. I sat down and realized that if I put 1 million dollars in a CD worth 5 percent, I would earn 50,000 dollars a year in interest. I would never have to work again. I could just live off of the interest. I would still probably work, but it would be nice to know I didn't have to if I didn't want to. Plus if a boss pissed me off at work I could just tell them off and not worry about losing my job. Now they have the online version of Monopoly which is equally as cruel. They really have perfected ways on getting people to come back and play more. Park Place is one of the easiest pieces to acquire. But Boardwalk is virtually impossible because it is worth a million. Some people out there probably don't realize that, so they just keep coming back to McDonalds thinking they just lucked out by getting Park Place and they are going to be equally as luck at getting Boardwalk. I'm one of those idiots. Ugh. I hate McDonalds. I'm convinced the online game is rigged as well. They make you think you are going to win certain properties but you never will. By the way, here are the "hard" pieces to get:

Boardwalk-
Pennsylvania Ave-
Ventnor Ave-
Kentucky Ave-
Tennessee Ave-
Virginia Ave-
Vermont Ave-
Mediterranean Ave-

And "Short Line" has always been the winning railroad piece!!

If you haven't started playing it yet...DON'T. It's unhealthy and a waste of time and money. But most importantly: It's ADDICTING!

By the way...

Don't you love how youtube takes videos down due to infringement only to be put back up by someone else later that day. Why do they even bother? This video was taken down so the old link (from a blog I did a few weeks ago) doesn't work so I'm reposting it again because it is so worthy. Do watch the bonus vids as well:




BONUS:



Another Bonus:

Who Am I?

I never make mistakes. I thought I did once, but I was mistaken.

I'm still here.

Things are going well here on the farm. We opened our show this week to a sold out crowd and they responded well. Our second show received a standing ovation (for Bearcreek that is quite an accomplishment because most of the patrons can't stand very well seeing how they are usually 70+) and last night we performed to another sold out audience including my parents. If anyone is interested in coming to the show let me know. I may be able to score some comp tickets. Other things have been going well. I'm going through that post rehearsal depression where I realize I have nothing to do but think about my life. Haha. No, but seriously, I'm great and I just need to find things to occupy my time. I'd like to start a myspace music page and write a few songs to put up on it. If anybody has any good lyrics let me know. I'm not much of a lyricist. I hope all is well with whoever reads this and leave me some comments to let me know how things are going with you!

Too funny

Here I Am.

So while most of my readers are enjoying basking in the sun next to their beach house, I am back at Bearcreek farms enjoying the relaxing sting of the mosquitos and the pleasant aroma of manure. I arrived here a couple days ago and have managed to go to the bar both nights I've been here. I am indifferent about being back here. I'm glad to see old faces that are happy to see me back but on the flip side I didn't really see myself coming back here so soon. I think the show will be fun though and I'm looking forward to putting it up. I'll keep you posted as much as possible on the progress and if any fun stories pop up! Hope all you beach heads are having a fab time!!! Miss you!